To plan or not to plan

I was never someone who fantasised about my wedding day. I didn't have the scrapbook of cut outs of wedding dresses, cakes and flowers. I just met with the people who will be doing my flowers and centre pieces and when asked what it is that I want I actually didn't have a clue. I had a vague idea of the colouring but at that moment I wish I could have lifted a dusty old scrapbook from my bag and plonked it onto the table.

Luckily they are professionals and soon sussed me out and they got a sense of what it is I want. We then moved inside (we met at the wedding venue) and proceeded to discuss where else we would need flowers. The gift table, the bridal party table will need three vases, next to the seating plan sheets, one vase outside and then it was suggested that we have flowers in the bathrooms. Mmm... I don't know. Do people really notice flowers while they wash their hands or check if their make up is still attached to their face? So it was a 'no' to the toilet flowers.

The list of things to do for a wedding never ends. I bought two bridal magazines, which I bought with much pride and with a smile that said, "yes, your quite right, I AM getting married". They were helpful in finding the style of dress that I wanted, the type of flower arrangements, but when it came to the 'to-do-lists' I could only but laugh.

It was suggested that six months before the wedding I need to begin a bridal health and beauty routine. As far as I'm concerned the only thing I am worried about is getting a funny tan line; health and beauty routine? No thanks. With two months to go it was suggested that I check if the groom has his wedding clothes organised. Can you imagine that conversation? "Matt, remember that you proposed and now we're getting married? Have you got your outfit sorted?" I mean, really, how ridiculous! Another lists said that I should create a wedding website nine months before the wedding. Need I say more? Some of the suggestions were really helpful but most of them were for brides who allow the wedding planning to take over their lives. Don't get me wrong, I am thrilled to be getting married and have really enjoyed planning it, but I am not going to let it consume my life.

Matt has also been so involved; phoning around for cake suppliers, organising the music, and always being involved in any decisions that need to be made. I don't understand how a man cannot be interested in the wedding planning process; he is, after all, the one that proposed in the first place and got the ball rolling.

To plan or not to plan? That is the question. I didn't plan before hand and I must say it has been a lot of fun planning as we go along. Yes, a very out-dated scrap book may have been helpful but I'm sure the things I liked when I was 12 years old would look pretty silly at my wedding now. So here it goes, eight weeks to go and I have no idea what needs to be done next and I love it.

"Love is not to be found in someone else, but in ourselves; we simply awaken it. But in order to do that, we need the other person." Paulo Coelho